Finding ideas for the holidays on social media is extremely useful! Instagram is full of thoughtful ideas and at the same time it is also a place where one can find themselves easily beat down about what you think you should have or do for the holidays. If you find yourself dreading the holidays, even as you scroll for recipes or a great centerpiece, you are not alone.

Holiday cheer isn’t guaranteed for all when the holidays come around. Holidays bring about a continuum of emotions and for many, negative emotions such as anxiety, depression, anger and stress related to expectations and obligations during this time are common.

For those who thrive at family gatherings and in preparing social events, the holidays can boost moods. However, it is easy and common for many of us to get pulled into the downward spiral of social comparison as we scroll Instagram for that last minute stocking project. Instagram can turn the hunt for a creative holiday idea into unrealistic standards about what our holidays, families, and friends should be like. We see pictures of perfect decorations and place settings, perfect turkeys, and perfect families, which may highlight feeling as though our lives are less-than-perfect and this is something to be ashamed of.

Research reveals that many of us do not have our holiday expectations met. In fact, as we get older, we typically take on more holiday responsibilities such as hosting, cooking, planning, and shopping, with a lot less help. Feeling overwhelmed can ramp up with the perfection seen on Instagram. When the work of the holidays takes away from the positive regard, it is easy to feel discouraged. Here are a few small steps to consider adjusting, to improve holiday cheer and reduce the negative impact of Instagram stories.

What to Focus on This Holiday Season:

● Use social media wisely. Rather than compare yourself, focus on positives such as ideas you can find online related to how you spend the holiday.

● Focus on your goals this season and what you want to achieve.

● Write out what you have to do, and then throw it away, it’s important to focus on your wants during the holidays.

● Focus on what makes you happy during the holidays and record it, for your own benefit. Capture positive moments you want to reflect back on.

● Ask others for help with holiday prep tasks that are of limited interest to you. Someone out there may love making table decorations!

● Take time to engage in your own self-care.

● Focus on gratitude; find small moments to reflect on what you are grateful for daily, during the holiday season.

● Holidays can also bring up negative feelings like sadness as we consider transitions and losses. Give yourself space to feel these emotions.

What Not to Focus on This Holiday Season:

● Avoid comparing your holidays to those on social media. We have no idea the planning prep that went into others’ photos nor what’s going on behind the scenes.

● Don’t post photos just for the likes, focus on capturing moments you want to reflect back on.

● Reframe unrealistic holiday goals like a 9-course meal. Focus on what you can achieve and want to achieve.

● Avoid getting swept up in holiday chaos. Take time for self-care and mindfulness to reflect on the season.

● Don’t apologize for things not being “perfect” during the holidays. You are human and it wouldn’t be natural to have everything handled yourself.

Whether scrolling through Instagram or relaxing at home, focus on the positives. Mindfulness, self-care, gratitude, and setting boundaries will improve your holiday cheer as well as your mood, health, energy and relationships. The holidays will also be a lot more fun.

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