The term “gaslighting” was one of the top searched terms of 2022.  So what is gaslighting? And how can you identify it?

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person or group makes someone question their own sanity, memory, or perception of events.  The term gaslighting comes from the 1938 play and the 1944 film “Gas Light”, about a husband who manipulates his wife into doubting her sanity. 

Gaslighting can take many forms, but some common tactics used by gaslighters include denying that certain events happened, twisting facts or events to suit their own narrative, or even planting false information in someone’s mind.  They may also use emotional manipulation, such as playing on someone’s insecurities or vulnerabilities, to control or exploit them.

Gaslighting can happen in any type of relationship, but it is particularly prevalent in romantic relationships, where one partner may use it to maintain control over the other.  It can also occur in friendships, family relationships, and even in professional settings.

Gaslighting can have negative consequences for the person being targeted.  It can decrease self-esteem and self-worth, can cause the person to doubt their own abilities and judgment, and can also lead to symptoms of depression and anxiety.  It can also make it difficult for the person to trust others or form healthy relationships in the future. 

It is important to recognize the signs of gaslighting, which include feeling confused, paranoid, feeling like you’re constantly apologizing or defending yourself, and feeling as if you can’t trust your own memories.  If you suspect that you are being gaslighted, it's important to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist.  It is also important to set boundaries with the person who is gaslighting you, and to make clear that their negative behavior is not acceptable.

We’re here for you. If you are concerned about how to navigate gaslighting in relationships, click here for additional support.