Dating during the pandemic? What are the rules? Is there an etiquette to it? While we currently live in an ever-changing world as social distancing remains at the forefront of much of what we do there are still ways to determine how to date safely and form connections with others, while still practicing social distancing. What are the fears around dating during the time of COVID?

• Fears of Isolation

It is completely valid and normal to have fears around dating at this time, while also being fearful of being isolated. Before the pandemic, 37.5 million people in the U.S. were living alone. Isolation and loneliness are linked to emotional and physical health concerns such as depression, anxiety, and heart disease.

• Fears of Wasting Time

It is also valid to fear one will be “wasting time” as the pandemic rages on. With social distancing rules in place, it can feel as though there is no way to meet potential partners, and this can also make one feel as if their future is put on hold, maybe even forcing them to date if they are not ready due to time passing. 

• Fears of Being Around Others

With ongoing concerns of transmission, the fear of being around someone is all too prominent at present, especially as we are recommended to physically distance ourselves.

 

So what are some strategies to manage these fears if we are considering dating?

1. Don’t force yourself to date if you are not ready to, or feel pressure around societal constraints of time passing. Dating isn’t a requirement and the present world is so new and ever-changing, it’s important to ensure you are ready to engage in dating, rather than pushing yourself to do so. Reflect on this and identify whether you feel comfortable at this time. 

2. If you are interested in dating, follow approaches to reduce your risk of exposure through wearing a mask when meeting up with others. Set boundaries you are most comfortable with.

3. Educate yourself around the most up-to-date information related to the virus. If you are not comfortable, try keeping dates virtual until you feel comfortable with in-person meet-ups. Research has shown that virtual dates can sometimes be more intimate and beneficial when getting to know someone as it forces you to attend and listen to the other person. Plus, it removes distractions that you might find on a date. You start to see who is truly genuine if the virtual interactions continue as your comfort grows.

4. We have all gone through this pandemic together and it has been stressful in many ways. This already creates a tie between you and the individual you are debating. Experiencing a stressful event can strengthen your emotional bond with someone and increase prosocial behaviors. 

5. When building a connection, have fun and be creative! Even on a virtual date you might cook together, tour one another’s home spaces, or start a book club! Game nights, movie nights, thinking outside the box around how you connect with others, dates, or friends and family! 

Dating during the time of COVID is still new, we are all learning what we are comfortable with and what works best. Just know, it’s important to follow what feels best for you during this time. It’s okay to reach out for support if you find yourself struggling with this as well.