When you show affection to your significant other, do you know if it’s the way that they like to receive it? Love can get lost in translation when two people have different types of love languages. The five love languages are different ways of expressing and receiving love. The concept of love languages was developed by Gary Chapman, Ph.D., in his book The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, where he describes these styles of communicating love.

New Years resolutions are part of celebrating the new years for some people. Making a list of goals and a plan to start on the 1st or the first Monday after the New Years is the usual norm. Rather than making a list of new goals this year, how about trying a different way to contemplate your goals and having a way to gauge your goals?

Grapes are nutritious and delicious, however we are referring to the acronym G.R.A.P.E.S. commonly used to address and combat depression. Symptoms of depression often include having feelings of sadness, even hopelessness, and lack of motivation. During times of depression, it can be helpful to follow these guidelines with the help of the following acronym, and to practice these regularly to reduce the possibility of experiencing depressive symptoms.

During a therapy session you have the space to talk about your emotions and stressors, confront your problems, and be provided with helpful feedback to support positive changes. The time spent in a therapy session can feel empowering, but this is only a small portion of your week. There are 168 hours in a week, less than one of those hours are spent in therapy. A common misconception is that attending your weekly therapy sessions is all that is needed, but the time in between therapy sessions also holds an important space to continue to progress. So the real question is, what do you do in the time in between therapy sessions? While there is not an exact science or formula that is guaranteed to work, the following are helpful tips and ideas to help you in between sessions.

Symptoms of anxiety consist of both physical and mental symptoms, which oftentimes can feel incredibly overwhelming and difficult to manage in the moment. While there are many different techniques and tricks to combat these symptoms, a helpful group of skills fall under grounding techniques. Grounding techniques work to bring awareness to the present moment and what is happening in the world around you. These help to distract from anxious thoughts and symptoms. In bringing awareness to the present moment, it can provide feelings of safety and create a space between you and your feelings of anxiety. Grounding techniques can include both physical and mental techniques to provide distractions. The following are examples of grounding techniques that you can begin to use and practice.

This may seem like a silly title. How can a person do anything but value what they identify as valuable to themselves? It is true that many people make time, and commit energy, to the things they hold in the highest regard such as family, relationships, success, education, etc. However, like so many things, this can become an unconscious endeavor and your values can easily fall away from your focus as you find yourself building different routines. If one is neglecting their values, they may be unconsciously reinforcing depression, anxiety, grief, or anger. So how do we interact with our values in such a way that our lives and goals feel effective and meaningful?

In a committed relationship, whether this is a romantic relationship or another close and intimate relationship, there are a few things that as humans, we typically respond more desirably to for the purposes of having an effective relationship. There are also things to which we respond undesirably. Some examples of things that we respond more desirably to would be validation, communication, loyalty, and trust. Consequently, the absence of some of or all these things can lead to what John Gottman and Nan Silver (The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, 1999) referred to as the “Four Horseman of the Apocalypse” for a relationship. These “four horsemen” include criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. One of the most destructive of these is Contempt. . However, there are safeguards that can be put in place to help protect yourself from this particular “horseman”.

We all experience stressors daily. Whether this be stress at work, running late, numerous family activities, or other daily tasks. Anxiety rises amidst all of these stressors which can lead to shifts in cortisol levels, exacerbating these negative feelings. So let’s stop for a moment. Take a 4-5-6 deep breath. Take a moment, close your eyes, and breathe in slowly for a count of 4, hold for count of 5 and breathe out for count of 6. Try this for 3 minutes or do this in a set of 10, with intention and mindful effort. Now slowly open your eyes and look around you. How are you feeling? What do you need in this moment? This is one strategy that can be used to manage stress on a day to day basis. Let’s look into a few more stress management strategies.

Being mindful is about remaining in the present moment and being aware of your current surroundings, thoughts, emotions and feelings. It is a practice often used in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy but also across different types of therapies. Read on for ways that mindfulness can support your overall wellbeing, particularly when it comes to managing stress.

Emotional experiences can feel so overwhelming. So much so that they can make us convinced that they are insurmountable, like a large wave coming over you as you stand in the shallow waters. It turns out that this is a very fitting metaphor for emotional spikes. Just as one can be overtaken and overwhelmed by a large wave, so too can one learn the skills needed to read the onset of the wave, position themselves effectively with it, and surf the wave which allows one to experience emotions with mastery and confidence. Additionally, because we experience emotions everyday of our lives, learning to surf your emotional waves can be practiced every day. This starts with seeing your feelings as a wave; strong, influential, and temporary… yes… temporary. Many cognitive patterns that lead to mental health disorders are habits that take single-emotion events and reinforce them again and again until they feel chronic. The emotion typically only lasted a few seconds or a few minutes at most and any secondary or lingering feelings are being upheld by what your thoughts, beliefs, and responses create. With this understanding, one can experience the emotional wave effectively in the moment before allowing that wave to return to the ocean never to come back in that exact form ever again.