Sometimes when we have been exposed to experiences that were hurtful, it can be difficult to heal. Especially if we feel that someone has wronged or harmed us. These feelings can take the form of grudges. Grudges are feelings of resentment that can be unhealthy to the individual carrying them. To let go of a grudge, try some of these suggestions.
1. Acknowledge The Grudge
Figure out what it is that’s causing you to hold on to the grudge. You have to know what the problem is in order to solve it. When you allow yourself to see the real issue you can then make a choice to move forward from there.
Grudges begin to take root as issues go un-confronted which is why it’s helpful to clarify your feelings on the situation. Think about whether your feelings are something you want to work through internally, or whether you want to talk it out with the other person.
3. See Things From Their Perspective
To gain a better understanding of the other persons view point, try to put yourself in their shoes. The more you understand the person who you are holding a grudge against, the easier it will be to let go of that grudge. The longer we hold a grudge the more difficult it is to forgive and move on.
4. Accept The Situation
Rather than stew in the grudge, choose to accept it for what it is. You can choose to create your own healing, without waiting for an apology from the other party.
5. Don’t Dwell
Once you decide to let go of your grudge, make sure you keep going and don’t look back. Don’t put too much thought into the situation or continue to discuss it with others. Dwelling grudge will only make it harder for you to let go. If the issue is ever brought up again in conversation, just change the subject quickly and leave it in the past.
6. Stay Positive
Instead of holding on to resentment, use this as a valuable lesson that can help you walk away with a better understanding of yourself. For every negative situation, there is a positive.
7. Choose To Forgive
Choosing to forgive does not mean your choosing to forget. It’s just accepting that no one is perfect and acknowledging that people make mistakes. Forgiving is not the easiest thing to do, especially if you’ve went through a lot of pain, but it’s the only way to truly have peace.