Communication is vital in any relationship (romantic, workplace, family, friendships). Communication helps in sharing expectations, feelings, disappointments, and opinions. Being open in these relationships helps to strengthen the bond between them. This communication is essential when you feel disappointed or after your feelings are hurt; however, these situations are the most intimidating to approach due to fear of rejection or an argument. When approaching these difficult conversations, it is important to enter with a soft startup to lay the foundation for a productive, calm conversation.

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) is based on a dialectical module which helps one to find the middle path or gray thinking with cognition and behaviors. When you think in a “all or nothing” way, you take on unnecessary stress and tension in life. DBT helps you think in terms of “all or at least something”.

Emotional experiences can feel so overwhelming. So much so that they can make us convinced that they are insurmountable, like a large wave coming over you as you stand in the shallow waters. It turns out that this is a very fitting metaphor for emotional spikes. Just as one can be overtaken and overwhelmed by a large wave, so too can one learn the skills needed to read the onset of the wave, position themselves effectively with it, and surf the wave which allows one to experience emotions with mastery and confidence. Additionally, because we experience emotions everyday of our lives, learning to surf your emotional waves can be practiced every day. This starts with seeing your feelings as a wave; strong, influential, and temporary… yes… temporary. Many cognitive patterns that lead to mental health disorders are habits that take single-emotion events and reinforce them again and again until they feel chronic. The emotion typically only lasted a few seconds or a few minutes at most and any secondary or lingering feelings are being upheld by what your thoughts, beliefs, and responses create. With this understanding, one can experience the emotional wave effectively in the moment before allowing that wave to return to the ocean never to come back in that exact form ever again.