How To Become More Persuasive

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Whether you’re trying to close a large sale or negotiating what’s for dinner, here are tips and techniques you can use to channel the power of persuasion.


Be Genuine

One unethical action can ruin all of your credibility. Never sacrifice morality for persuasion. No one likes a fake. Persuasive people know who they are and are confident in their own skin.

Know Who You Are Talking To

Different people have different personalities. To become more persuasive, you must truly understand the personality behind who you’re speaking with. Are they the high energy type? Or, are they shy and reserved? Knowing when and how to turn your assertiveness up or down can go a long way towards getting the other person to hear your point of view.

Build Rapport

Don’t get caught up in the minutia. You’re talking to a human being, not an opponent or a target. No matter how compelling your argument, if you fail to connect on a personal level, he or she will doubt everything you say.

Cast A Vision

Paint a clear and vivid picture of how their world will change once your idea is implemented. Persuasive people use powerful imagery to tell vivid stories about the impact their ideas will have. Good stories create images that are easy to understand and difficult to forget.

Be Confident, Not Pushy

Persuasive people establish their ideas with a level of confidence, without being too aggressive.

Use Body Language

Body language is so important when it comes to communicating with others. Your gestures, expressions, and tone can all be used as tools to engage people and change their perspectives. Some examples of positive body language are: Smiling, making eye contact, standing with an open posture, and leaning in towards the other person. Mimicking body language is also a subtle way to connect with people on an unconscious level. The point is, when it comes to persuasion, how you communicate something is usually more important than what you’re communicating.

Acknowledge The Opposing Viewpoint

One powerful tactic is to concede to the other person’s view point. By doing this, you are showing that you are open minded and have their best interests in mind. You can use phrases like, “I can see your point.” or “I’ve never thought about it that way.” Once the opposing view point is acknowledged, the person you are speaking with will disarm. This will open the door for you to pose some thoughtfully crafted questions.

Ask Good Questions

Questions are the best way to get people to open up to different ideas and points of views. The reason for this is because questions get people thinking, while comments get people defending. If you want to challenge someone’s ideas, ask a question that opens their mind up to considering your viewpoint rather than telling them your view point is correct.

Know When to Quit

When people sense urgency or aggression, they shut down. Trying to force people into doing something your way never works. Your impatience will cause them to hold on to their viewpoints even stronger. A more effective approach is to give the other person some space to process your arguments. Good ideas often take some time to sink in.


Want to become more persuasive at home or at work? Try a virtual coaching session with one of our licensed talk therapists. Click the link below for more information.