communication in relationships
Blending two families can be a complex and challenging process. With some basic skills and commitment to ideas like being patient, having open communication, and a willingness to compromise, it is possible to create a harmonious and fulfilling family dynamic. Here are a few tips to keep in mind if you are in the process of blending two families:
As you go through life, it’s important to fully understand what makes up a healthy relationship. This is something that is not taught in schools & is usually learned through trial & error based on previous experiences. Personal relationships will develop within families, friends, colleagues & acquaintances. The shared experience of living, working & spending time together with similar interests is what creates emotional bonds, interactions & trusting relationships.
Validating your partner is a skill that is essential to establishing and maintaining intimacy. When you validate your partner, you are letting them know that you see how they are feeling, their feelings are important to you, and you are giving reassurance that they feel that way. Everyone has a different experience, and those in distress may experience painful feelings for different reasons. What is hurtful for one partner may not be the same for another. Validating your partner is not the same as being in agreement, you can still disagree and validate.
Love can have a language of its own, from the way we show love to the way we like to receive love. It is important to be in tune with how you prefer to be loved by others, this can make it easier to understand what it is we are looking for from others. It is also important to understand how your partner likes to receive love because this can make it easier to make them feel appreciated in their own way. In 1992 Dr. Gary Chapman wrote the book “The 5 Love Languages” which can help to work as a guide, noting five areas that are most prominent ways that individuals show and receive love. Take a minute to reflect on how you feel appreciated or loved by others, now look at the following descriptions of the five love languages to see where you align!
In a committed relationship, whether this is a romantic relationship or another close and intimate relationship, there are a few things that as humans, we typically respond more desirably to for the purposes of having an effective relationship. There are also things to which we respond undesirably. Some examples of things that we respond more desirably to would be validation, communication, loyalty, and trust. Consequently, the absence of some of or all these things can lead to what John Gottman and Nan Silver (The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, 1999) referred to as the “Four Horseman of the Apocalypse” for a relationship. These “four horsemen” include criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. One of the most destructive of these is Contempt. . However, there are safeguards that can be put in place to help protect yourself from this particular “horseman”.
